Untethering Productivity from Self-Worth

Rest isn’t a reward for productivity, rest is an active way to build resilience. Say it to yourself one more time and let it sink in. We all need more resilience for our lifestyles that move at warp speed.

I listen to a lot of podcasts about wellness, but I am quite sure I came to this conclusion on my own. It just clicked one day, after 40 years of believing that my self-worth was derived from my achievements. As a society, we are obsessed with work and our careers are tied to our identity. 

We value productivity over basic needs like sleep and eating. It’s so ingrained in me, that I actually find checking tasks off a list to be as calming as a hot bath.

Self-worth can take many forms, but at its core is a deep belief that you are worthy of love and compassion. While you can gain self-worth from many outside sources, it’s really a confidence and inner knowing within, in its truest form. So cultivating a true sense of self-worth takes some rest, to go inward and reflect. And when we give our bodies and minds a chance to shut down, we are not just fueling our tanks, we are expanding our tanks too so we can tolerate more.

The notion of work-life balance completely went kaput during the COVID pandemic when our dining rooms became our offices. There was literally no space for separation of work and home life and no hard stops between productivity and rest. Not having to commute should have given many of us an opportunity for downtime, but that saved time was stolen by the chore of finding new ways to accomplish essentials like grocery shopping and educating our kids. Even through a pandemic, productivity took precedence over health for many of us. And it was all for the ego because that is what has always been drilled into us. 

I don’t mean to suggest that you shouldn’t be proud of yourself for your accomplishments. But if your accomplishments are your only basis of self-worth, then it becomes a problem. The older I get, the more I realize the importance of how you treat people and make others feel. And the more resilient you are to stressors, the easier it is to treat people with kindness. Hopefully, one day we will be a culture that values rest as much as we do achievement. Until then, all you can do is make rest a priority so you can cultivate your own resilience.